Fall / Winter 2021 | A conversation with Gretchen Heinen

 

Gretchen Heinen is the founder of Net Worth It podcast and school, the leading faith-based business school to turn ideas into legacy businesses and overcome financial limiting beliefs. She is a leader in the international health community, Find Your Fit, and supports godly women to meet their financial goals. 

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A conversation with Gretchen Heinen

Today’s Exclusive Guest.

Who is Gretchen Heinen?

Gretchen Heinen calls godly women higher together to support and hit business goals. She is a leader in the international health community, Find Your Fit, where thousands of people come to rebalance their physical health naturally so they can show up as their most productive selves. She is the founder of Net Worth It podcast and school, the leading faith-based business school to turn ideas into legacy businesses and overcome financial limiting beliefs. She is also a foster, biological and stepmom, and believes that love, not DNA, defines family. She allows God to lead her businesses and believes our true potential unleashes when we take our spiritual callings and execute on them. She is defined by her passion, commitment, inspirational belief system, and sheer determination to create the life of her dreams, regardless of whatever challenges may be thrown at her. She went from being this burnt out, stressed out, registered nurse to doing amazing things; helping, supporting, and healing other people. She realized that she needed to make a shift and change her life to propel herself moving forward.

 

My journey

Usually, if you go into healthcare or a service-based field, you are a helper. That is your nature or what you desire, and I think with helpers, sometimes there is not a boundary with the people around you. If you do not create the boundary, there will be no boundary. That is exactly what happened to me. So even if you are listening and you are not a nurse, you might resonate with the feeling of it. I just found myself having graduated from nursing school, and thinking I was going to save the world, and then getting into it and realizing that it took everything out of me. There was not a lot left at the end of the day for my family. I had a baby at the time, my husband and my own personal life and health.

 The thing that bothered me the most about it is that I could not even live the life that I wanted to financially. Even though I was living in my purpose, and what I felt was my calling, I was not making enough money to live healthy outside of there. The field of nursing is definitely better money than a lot of other fields, but the kind of life I wanted to live, I could not live on my nursing salary. Here I was, not making enough money for what I wanted out of life and feeling like I was totally depleted by the time I got home at the end of the day. That is what led me into entrepreneurship because I thought, how else can I make money?

 I knew I did not want a second job and already do not have enough time. I looked at ways I could leverage my skills and partner with companies to make more money; and that is what got me into entrepreneurship. From there, and this is a key thing, even though I continued to work as a nurse, I changed where I worked. That is so critical. I love being a nurse. It is not that I do not want to be a nurse, I just do not want to feel depleted at the end of my day.

 

Saying No / Navigating it all.

Everyone likes to project onto me. I’m shading the story because people say to me, “You’re so busy” and I always say “No, I’m not”. What is my life, is there because that is what I can handle. You do not have to handle what I handle or take on what I take on. If you hear this and you are thinking, oh gosh she’s got a lot going on.  We can each learn how to handle more differently or have different boundaries.

I married a guy who had a kid, that is how I became a step-mom. I was a step-mom before biological mom and then we had some children together. My husband, when he met me, told me that he was a foster youth and he spent about six years of his childhood in the foster care system, and it was really important for him to give back. Of course, I fell in love with that idea, but when it became a reality, it is a lot more to it than just happy, rosy foster mom. It still has been an amazing journey, and we have kids at our home right now. You do not always have kids.  They come and go based on what their needs are, but it has been a really cool way to try to heal the next generation of people.

 

A different perspective

My mom has Parkinson’s and sometimes I feel pain when I look at her because I know what she is experiencing must feel painful. When you talk to her, she will always say, “Parkinson’s is such a gift.” It taught me how to appreciate every single thing in my life. Imagine having that mindset about a chronic illness that will eventually result in your life ending, to be like, this is a gift because now I appreciate every little thing.

 

Half empty or half full? / Work-Life Balance.

This is my favorite topic because you are talking about an achiever, a person who thrives on winning or achieving. A lot of business-minded people are like that. I do not think you have to be in business to have that mind. Maybe you are listening, and you are not in business, but you just have that goal-driven, outcome-driven spirit. That is a gift. However, I will say that if you have unhealed parts of your life, experiences that happened to you as a child that made you be that way, maybe you were neglected or abused in some way or made fun of or bullied or felt left out; trauma people forget. I know you know all about this, but people forget that trauma is not very newsworthy, hard things that happened to you.

It is not always these major, major things. Trauma can be witnessing something like a car accident and then your nervous system never resets. We do not realize that things that triggered us and jarred our nervous system at any point in our life, if we do not learn how to deal with those, they will 100% show up for you later, especially when you are trying to go after a goal. What I noticed for myself is, I was really outspoken, loud, assertive, and desired to be in control of my future and my finances, and I got that way because at one point before that, I did not feel in control. Someone had taken away my power and I felt harmed by this person. The circumstances do not matter but that feeling of not being in control resulted in me taking on a position of being in control

That is great for entrepreneurship, but eventually that is going to come back. A better thing, instead of just pushing through all those goals, is to look back and look at where I have unhealed areas that I could be working. Once you integrate that, when you are trying to hit those goals, that is not going to show up as a sticky, rough point. It is going to show up as cool. You get to integrate this thing that happened and realize you have a gift from it now, but it also could have negative consequences if you do not learn how to integrate it. You do not get your cool business ideas when you are stressed out. You get them when you are for example on the beach or in the shower or on a walk.

 

A Faith-led business.

I help women with turning ideas into income. I took this problem solving ability in nursing, and I turned it into entrepreneurship by solving problems for other people and exchanging that with money; that is entrepreneurship! What you learn as a nurse is how to solve problems all day long, many of them very critical problems. I became very good at problem solving .  It essentially turned it into business coaching for people who feel stuck in their business. I do not have professional coaching certificates or anything like that. I was helping all these women, and we had women after women coming through for my programs. I, however, always felt like something was missing in the alignment of my business. I realized it was my faith. I am so spiritual about my business. I pray to God every day. It is the first thing I do when I wake up. My faith is in the Christian faith, so I read my Bible. That is such a big part of me, so if I left that out of helping other women, that would be crazy. The problem is, I was so worried about being inclusive to all religions and all beliefs that I left it out because I thought it was actually helping people by leaving it out. What I found is, it is actually better for me to work with the woman who is my same faith, because I can speak to her on a level that another coach cannot. There is 8 billion people on the planet. I cannot help all of them, and they all do not need my help, so it is okay if I serve this particular population.

Doing healing work on myself is the absolute reason they are able to see me. I think when you do not do the healing work, you show up like you were forced. When you watch those videos on Instagram, you can tell when the person does not really feel confident in what they are doing, but they know they need to show up. They are doing it scared, which is cool. We all got to do that, but I think sometimes that happens because we have unhealed areas of our lives that make us not be seen so authentically. Once I healed all the areas that were the reason I felt like I had to control everything, and really did the work. I am talking serious, in-person work, I could just be me. I did not care if it was right or wrong or perfect or not; and that is a favorite thing people love about me – I am just me. It took me a long time to just be me because every day I looked on Instagram and thought I needed to be her, or I should try what she is doing or look at the way she does it. Until I could heal, I could not see who I was. I could only mimic what other people were.

 

 Road to healing

The first thing is, I listened to what my body was telling me. I literally shut my eyes and felt like I was pulsating. I could feel my adrenals kicking out, trying to kick out emptiness because there was no adrenaline left. I felt irritation to my kids when they did the smallest things. I started paying attention to all the ways that I was showing up. I was irritated at my spouse, eating sugar all the time. I listened to my body and what was happening. I was not trying to judge it or fix it, I wanted to know what was actually happening. I still do this practice today. I journaled out what I was feeling and figured out what it is, that is the first step.

The second step is finding help. If you are in LA, go see Jessica or someone, real in-person help is what I am talking about. I saw a faith-based group program for people who have experienced trauma because that is what I needed. For ten weeks, three hours a week, we did the work. It was looking at patterns and things that have happened, going back to that, feeling what it felt like in that moment. Some people call that inner child work. It is all a healing process. That was it – doing the actual work and learning how to revisit it when it comes up again. It is an integration of it, not forgetting it, but learning how to reframe it.

 

Spiritual hygiene and practices

No matter what religion you are watching the sunrise, there is a five minute window where it will pop its head up and then be done and up for the day. I try to catch as many of those as I can because it reminds me of time and opportunity.

There are some days where I do not commit to it, and then I realize how I feel and know that I do not want to do this. I do not want to feel this way tomorrow, and go back to what I know is going to make me feel good. I also remind myself that it is not linear. It is up and down. Otherwise, you could quit when it is down, but then a double portion of up is on its way and you quit right before you get to receive that? There is going to be highs and lows and if I can ride both of these the same, instead of getting so jacked when it is high and thinking grandiose thoughts, and then when it is low feeling like it is lower than it actually is. That is another thing that helps when you are healed, your emotions do not hijack you as much.

Your business should not be run by your emotions. Get some data, even if it is small data like how many listens on a podcast or how many connections made in a week, that you can measure. This can be little things that you have some control over, for example you have control over how many connections you make in a week and measure a little bit every day. Write it down in a journal; I write what I am going to accomplish for the day, so I can always look back and see all the things I accomplished for the week. That way when I get to the end of the week, even if there is not a sale, I still made progress. It might not be like the girl who made a hundred grand in a week; that is where we get caught up in thinking we need to be like someone else.

 

Tips & Takeaways

From a healing perspective, I would say be honest with how you feel in your emotions and everything going on. When we get into trouble is when we try to pretend that we are further along or we try to show up a certain way, especially on the internet, because we think that is what we should do. Be you and be real. Try something, learn, and then try again if it serves your audience. Go to ideatoincomewebinar.com we have a free webinar that will basically help with how to tell if an idea will make money, you can go watch that. Essentially, it is knowing that you are going to try a bunch of things. If you can fall in love with the process and the journey instead of the outcome, you are going to love entrepreneurship. Every day you are going to wake up and get to solve new problems. If you are in it for some endgame, I think it is going to feel hard.

 

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